Now that I’ve been a mom for almost 2 years, well past the newborn stage, I think I’m comfortable enough to tell other new moms out there that it’s going to be absolutely fine. It’s very hard to see the silver lining right now, but this too shall pass. The newborn stage is very confusing and stressful for moms, more than others imagine. You’re suddenly responsible for a little human who is completely dependent on you. It’s absolutely normal to feel overwhelmed, to feel depressed and question yourself all the time. The sudden surge of hormones aren’t helping either. But mama, just keep doing your best at all times and stay positive. Here are a few things to help you in Staying positive as a new mom.
As long as the weather permits, make sure to get some fresh air every single day. If you’re like me in the suburbs, make the most of your surroundings. Explore new trails or keep at a known path, the choice is yours. Just make sure to get out for an hour every day, with or without the baby. Yes, target runs count if that makes you happy. This will surely help you Staying positive as a new mom
Don’t hesitate asking for help
There’s absolutely no shame to seek help. Weather you have a close circle or a bunch of friends, go ask for help. Once you’ve put it out there, you’ll really know who cares. Now mind you, it’s not always possible for people to make time for you. Everyone has their own priorities. Even if someone can’t physically help you out, talk. Make sure you always have open communication and let others know what you’re going through. The truth is, EVERYONE has times of self-doubt, guilt and all that bad stuff. The more you speak, the more you will realize that you’re not alone.
Build your village
Taking off from the above point, build your village. Build a community of like-minded friends, new parents just like you, parents with older kids to guide you, and trusted family members.
It’s OK to delegate
If you’re a mother like me, you’d find it very difficult to delegate tasks around your baby. I wanted to do everything myself as I felt that it was best if I did it my way. Much later down the road did I realize that it’s actually ok to let go and let someone else handle certain tasks. I’d also like to point out that no one else can care for your baby exactly the way you do, so don’t expect anyone else to mirror you – it’s not going to happen. Every person has their own way of handling situations. But at the end of the day, you are the mother and you can give instructions of how you prefer certain things being done. But then you need to be hands off and let go.
Take some time out for yourself
The mom guilt is a real thing and only other moms can truly understand it. Taking out some time for yourself is not being selfish and it is not at the expense of your family. It is a necessity as every human needs their own space. With newborns, it is easy to loose your sense of individuality and sense of motivation. But try and keep doing things you loved doing before you had the baby. It could be just chatting with some old friends, or getting to that new Nail Bar. You could go watch a stand up comedy show or just go get coffee for yourself. Whatever ticket your fancy, just go and do it. Try to dedicate some time every week when your partner or any other reliable caregiver can handle your baby while you’re away.
Signing off with this fantastic video by my Favorite Kristina Kuzmic
If nothing seems to be helping, seek professional help. It’s better for you, and better for your family. Always stay positive and think about the bigger picture.
Hang in there mama, there’s light in the end of this road that leads you to absolute bliss. Staying positive as a new mom is not always easy, but it is possible.
Check out my column on Celebrating Motherhood for some positive vibes.